IMPISH_CROW 01

[sfx: door opening]

Toki: Excuse us…! There’s nobody here? Well then…

Tsugumi: Toki! What are you doing hovering in the doorway? Let’s hurry on in!

Toki: H-hey, Tsugu! Don’t shove!

Hibari: You too, Mitsuru! Come on in! Don’t just stand around like that.

Mitsuru: H-Huh? Hibari? G’morning… Where are we?

Tsugumi: Mitsuru, you’re barely awake…

[sfx: door closing]

Tsugumi: Still, this place is crazy! When DigPro said we’d get our own studio…

Hibari: I hear it was pretty easy to handle within the company. I suppose it’s because there’s a lot of other talents also doing radio shows.

Tsugumi: Woah, as expected from a major talent agency! But, what are we supposed do we do now?

Toki: Tsugu. Did you even read the message from Tobikura-san earlier?

Hibari: We’re here to do some PR to tell the world about Impish Crow.

Tsugumi: Whaat, but then I already know what I’m gonna say! We’re the coolest, so you should totally support us!

Toki: No matter how many times you say it it’s still way too blunt.

Tsugumi: Really? Then what do you think I should say?

Mitsuru: [Yawn] I think Tobi-chan said something about that in his message. Let me see…Here.

Tsugumi: Let’s have a look then… “Here are three main points to hit for your promotional freetalk…” Gk! He’s written a bunch…

Mitsuru: Oh, you’re right.

Tsugumi: Well, it’s probably best if Toki handles all the talking, right? Since he’s the leader and all…

Hibari: Ah, sounds great! Let’s go with that!

Toki: Don’t just shove all the work onto me!

Tsugumi: But still, we’re a band, not show hosts. There’s no we can stay entertaining for that long, it’s impossible!

Toki: That’s exactly what I thought. And that’s why I had us all meet here ahead of time. Consider this a full rehearsal!

Tsugumi: Hah?

Hibari: So you’re saying… you secretly organised to have us meet here early so we could rehearse?

Mitsuru: Oh, so that’s why the staff still aren’t here?

Toki: If I didn’t you, guys would have arrived at the very last minute. We’re pros now. PR stuff like this is part of our job too, so don’t go around saying it’s impossible! What are we gonna do if our very first album flops? What then?

Hibari: It's times like these I remember just how passionate you are, Toki-kun, always preparing for the worst!

Toki: Let’s just call it risk management. Now come on, we’re short on time. Let’s get started already. Mitsuru, the message from Tobikura-san. Read it out for us.

Mitsuru: Okay, on it. Uhm… “First, introduce your band name.”

Toki: Right, let’s give it a shot. One, two–!

Impish Crow: (Voices overlapping awkwardly) We are Impish Crow!

Tsugumi: Uwah, we sound kinda lame.

Toki: We’ve got bigger problems than sounding lame. Like being completely out of sync even though I counted us in.

Mitsuru: Speaking all at the same time is pretty difficult. Should we practice?

Hibari: Isn’t this exactly the kind of thing they can, like, fix for us in post?

Toki: [Sigh] Next. Next point.

Mitsuru: Next one is… “Promote yourselves using your band positions.”

Tsugumi: I’m the vocalist, Mitsuru plays bass, Hibari drums, and Toki’s the leader!

Toki: You left me out on having an instrument on purpose.

Tsugumi: Whoops, I didn’t mean to, my bad, promise!

Hibari: I mean, Guitar’s the only one left, so what’s the issue? Process of elimination or whatever.

Toki: ‘Cuz it’s unorganised!

Tsugumi: Mitsuru, what’s next?

Mitsuru: “Talk about how you feel now that you’re finished recording the album.”

Tsugumi: How I feel…? [Sudden superior air] This band is the best in the world, and I am a musical genius. Listen closely to the details and you’ll understand.

Toki: Oi, stop it! Don’t dare say another word of your spiel.

Tsugumi: But then I don’t even know what else to say!

Mitsuru: Getting them to listen is our first goal, right?

Hibari: Although, we’re really just trying to appeal to as many people as possible with this promotional stuff, so… maybe it would be a good idea to actually go into those details a little?

Toki: Yes, exactly. What Hibari said.

Tsugumi: Go into the details, huh…

Hibari: Tricky, right…? What about if we talked about the album-making process?

Toki: Oh, like a ‘behind the scenes’ thing. That’s pretty good.

Mitsuru: A ‘making of’ story?

Hibari: Hmm…We could talk about poor Toki-kun frantically trying to get our airheaded Tsugu-chan to do his work and having to resort to shady business?

Toki: Hey, don’t say shit that people are obviously gonna misunderstand.

Mitsuru: How about back we were announcing going pro, and he was putting his all into practicing his statement with those cue cards?

Tsugumi: Or how about when he was so embarrassed about the lyrics he wrote that he messed up right at the end of the performance?

Toki: Hey, cut it out!

Hibari: My, you’re awfully grumpy today, Toki-kun!

Tsugumi: Yeah, Toki!

Mitsuru: I think you practicing really hard is nice, actually.

Toki: Come on, why are they all about me?!

Mitsuru: Okay, well, next one says…

Tsugumi: Whaat? There’s even more?

Hibari: Be careful, if annoy him any more, Toki-kun might go bald!

Toki: WHO’RE YOU CALLING BALD!?! ^[1]

[sfx: door opening, Tobikura entering]

Tobikura: You all seem to be getting on well! Good morning!

[sfx: door closing]

Tobikura: Huh? Toki-kun, what seems to be the matter?

Tsugumi: About that, you’ve gotta hear this, Tobi-chan! Toki was super excited to do the promotional talk today, so…

Hibari: He came earlier than anyone else to rehearse by himself, and he’s got it down perfectly! Guess we’ve got no choice but to leave it to our leader!

Mitsuru: Right. So he doesn’t go bald.

Toki: [Defeated sigh] Fine, fine! I’ll do it, okay?

Tobikura: The plan was originally for all of you to make comments individually but… I understand! Toki-kun is the one with the strongest sense of responsibility as the leader. Plus, if you’re all on the same page, this is probably the most ImpCrow way to go about it!

Tsugumi: Right?! Man, you’re the best, Tobi-chan! You totally get us!

Tobikura: Understood! Well then, I supposed we’ll get started with the tour!

Hibari: And as we discussed a moment ago, Toki-kun will be taking charge of everything but our band name introduction!

Mitsuru: Toki, I’m rooting for you.

Toki: (Dripping with sarcasm) Hahaha… You guys really… have such appreciation for your leader, huh?

Tobikura: I’ll be cheering you on from the sidelines too! Best of luck, Toki-kun!